Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Celtic Night
Ashton took Aspen, Grandpa Call and I to Celtic Nights at the Ellen Eccles. It was SOOOO good. He knows how much I love anything Irish. St. Patty's day is one of my favorite Holidays, and growing up my dad taught me MANY MANY Irish songs. My Grandma Pecks side of the family (ancestors) are from Ireland - the Gagans, so I have a tender place in my heart for anything Irish. The music and dancing was lovely and Aspen enjoyed bouncing up and down and singing the songs she knew along with them. We had to chuckle a bit. She is such a darling child. I love her so much!
Sunday, January 22, 2012
This and That & my ramblings like usual
Does anyone read blogs anymore? I notice - not just on mine, mine is ALWAYS sparse on comments, I rarely have any, but that's no one's fault but my own, I tend to be bland and boring for the most part. But even on my friends lately I've noticed there aren't a TON of comments, 2 or 3 here and there...so I was just wondering if anyone blogs anymore. Aw well, still have to do my journaling. lol.
Finally starting to feel a little better from the surgery. Tired. Really tired, but that's ok. If I can have another baby it will all be worth it. In relief society today, a lady was talking about children and how they always keep us on our toes, how if you have multiple children it's like they decide who is going to be the challenging child that week and who it will be next week, so that parents are always kept on their toes and having to deal with one crisis or another. I found it funny. Then she asked me how many children I had, I told her I had one that was almost 6. And as experience has taught me here, the same face of question and pity that shows up on everyone's face showed up on her's sure enough (though unlike others I don't get upset about it - I tend to laugh about it - for some reason it always makes me wrinkle my nose a little and smile inside. It's not that it's not a hard thing to not be able to have children. I didn't know this would be one of my trials, I do have a hard time with it, but for some reason I was blessed to find it funny that I always get the same reaction from people rather then feel annoyed) so after telling her what I tell everyone (that she's all I've been blessed with-so I'll take it) she says "well, I was never able to have many children either. I just tell people I was working on quality, not quantity." I laughed right out loud and decided to take that on as my mantra. I make quality children, not quantity. Bahaha! I loved it.
This is why I go to church I suppose. I always sit by the grandmas, they are my favorite, have been since childhood. I have a lot of grandma friends in my ward, but no one my age, I haven't even tried yet...I never feel comfortable with people my age. I'd rather talk about world war 2, the rat pack, black and white photos, poems, old songs, I feel like a 50-60 year old trapped in a 28 year old body. I'm an old soul. :0)
Aspen and I got some quality time while I have been down for surgery. I got a little taste for what it would be like to be a stay at home mom - minus all the T.V. we watched of course :0). It was nice to have time to snuggle her, read with her, listen to her. She has so much in that brain of hers, she is just sooo smart. She is reading so well now, she can read big words that just surprise me coming out of her mouth. Her love language is most definetely touch, many times throughout the day she will say to me "it's nuggle time!" which is the way she says snuggle. I don't correct her, because I think it is so cute. She can say it the right way, but it's one of the few words she stills uses "baby language" for, and I'm sad enough she has grown so fast. I find baby language cute. As much as other people think it's wrong to let them talk that way. It only lasts such a short while. That was a weird tangent to go off on. yes, that is my random brain at work.
I'm starting to freak out about this semester a little bit. I'm wondering how I'm going to get through all my classes and work 2 jobs at the same time, and be a mommy, but I'm trying to hold onto the peace I felt a few weeks ago, I know God will watch out for me and let it work out.
Here's where I am taking votes by the way...Do I go back to blonde or stay a brunette? I need to update my hair since I'm feeling rather "amish" these days with my straight boring hair I keep pulled back most the time. Its been a while since I got it done and my roots are looking great. Time for a refresher. So if you have an opinion let me know. :0)
Did I ever mention we have two dogs right now? Yeah. Two dogs. Now. That's a lot of potty training. We have a schnauzer and a chocolate lab. Don't ask me why or how we ended up with two puppies...I can't quite say...I just know I was still under anesthesia when the 2nd puppy showed up...
And there you have my this and that for this week
And now some photos from my phone...since that's about the only photos I get usually...I'm lazy...need to do better when it comes to my family. And a photo of my dark hair...
Finally starting to feel a little better from the surgery. Tired. Really tired, but that's ok. If I can have another baby it will all be worth it. In relief society today, a lady was talking about children and how they always keep us on our toes, how if you have multiple children it's like they decide who is going to be the challenging child that week and who it will be next week, so that parents are always kept on their toes and having to deal with one crisis or another. I found it funny. Then she asked me how many children I had, I told her I had one that was almost 6. And as experience has taught me here, the same face of question and pity that shows up on everyone's face showed up on her's sure enough (though unlike others I don't get upset about it - I tend to laugh about it - for some reason it always makes me wrinkle my nose a little and smile inside. It's not that it's not a hard thing to not be able to have children. I didn't know this would be one of my trials, I do have a hard time with it, but for some reason I was blessed to find it funny that I always get the same reaction from people rather then feel annoyed) so after telling her what I tell everyone (that she's all I've been blessed with-so I'll take it) she says "well, I was never able to have many children either. I just tell people I was working on quality, not quantity." I laughed right out loud and decided to take that on as my mantra. I make quality children, not quantity. Bahaha! I loved it.
This is why I go to church I suppose. I always sit by the grandmas, they are my favorite, have been since childhood. I have a lot of grandma friends in my ward, but no one my age, I haven't even tried yet...I never feel comfortable with people my age. I'd rather talk about world war 2, the rat pack, black and white photos, poems, old songs, I feel like a 50-60 year old trapped in a 28 year old body. I'm an old soul. :0)
Aspen and I got some quality time while I have been down for surgery. I got a little taste for what it would be like to be a stay at home mom - minus all the T.V. we watched of course :0). It was nice to have time to snuggle her, read with her, listen to her. She has so much in that brain of hers, she is just sooo smart. She is reading so well now, she can read big words that just surprise me coming out of her mouth. Her love language is most definetely touch, many times throughout the day she will say to me "it's nuggle time!" which is the way she says snuggle. I don't correct her, because I think it is so cute. She can say it the right way, but it's one of the few words she stills uses "baby language" for, and I'm sad enough she has grown so fast. I find baby language cute. As much as other people think it's wrong to let them talk that way. It only lasts such a short while. That was a weird tangent to go off on. yes, that is my random brain at work.
I'm starting to freak out about this semester a little bit. I'm wondering how I'm going to get through all my classes and work 2 jobs at the same time, and be a mommy, but I'm trying to hold onto the peace I felt a few weeks ago, I know God will watch out for me and let it work out.
Here's where I am taking votes by the way...Do I go back to blonde or stay a brunette? I need to update my hair since I'm feeling rather "amish" these days with my straight boring hair I keep pulled back most the time. Its been a while since I got it done and my roots are looking great. Time for a refresher. So if you have an opinion let me know. :0)
Did I ever mention we have two dogs right now? Yeah. Two dogs. Now. That's a lot of potty training. We have a schnauzer and a chocolate lab. Don't ask me why or how we ended up with two puppies...I can't quite say...I just know I was still under anesthesia when the 2nd puppy showed up...
And there you have my this and that for this week
And now some photos from my phone...since that's about the only photos I get usually...I'm lazy...need to do better when it comes to my family. And a photo of my dark hair...
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
surgery
I have been in pain for the past 6 months, the doctors thought it had to do with my endometriosis and cysts that I had before so they did another laproscopy yesterday. 4 years ago I had this same surgery and they found a bunch of scar tissue and removed it. I felt great for the last four years. I was in a ton of pain after that surgery, couldn't walk on my own and spent a lot of time crying from the pain. This time they just removed a little endometriosis tissue and found varicose veins on my uterus and my uterus a little inflamed, so nothing more they could do about it. The doctor said that could be what is causing the pain. Anyhow, this time around I feel a lot better. The pain is bearable, and I can walk a little better on my own. I hurt when I'm laying down, but when I am sitting I am fine. Aspen was bummed she couldn't climb in bed next to me, so she slept at the end of my bed silly girl.
The next step is more tests I guess. It's a double edge sword. it's good they didn't find anything too wrong, but not good because then they can't fix the pain or figure why I can't get pregnant. Guess we are back to stage one...
The next step is more tests I guess. It's a double edge sword. it's good they didn't find anything too wrong, but not good because then they can't fix the pain or figure why I can't get pregnant. Guess we are back to stage one...
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Moments you know God loves you
Moment 1: 3 new photos opportunities - shooting Instacare Doctors for Intermountain Healthcare, A new part time job with SDesigns Photography being a producer/assistant, USU hired me again for some side jobs
Moment 2: I wasn't supposed to be able to graduate until next spring, only due to one class that is not offered until next spring. With some guidance and some tender mercies and patience from God I was able to make it so I can be done with school Fall 2012!! My Professor is not making me take the studio class that is not offered until Spring, instead he hired me to be a producer on a film he will be making this year on Autism, this is how I will fulfill my credits. SO AWESOME! And I was able to get into ALL three classes I needed to, that normally I would have to be a senior before getting into, but by the Grace of God all the professors signed me in anyway, so I won't have to wait a year to graduate!!
Moment 3: My depression I have had for the past 2 months finally lifted! Things are looking up.
Moment 4: I go in for surgery on Monday to have a laproscopy. Not super fun, BUT 3 of my school classes for next week are cancelled, so I won't have to miss all my classes for the surgery. Good timing.
Moment 5: Sweet hugs and kisses from Aspen when I got home from School
Moment 6: Ashton cleaned up all the dog poop from the dogs pen before I got home. SOOO nice.
There are just moments when I just smile and feel like everything is right in the world and I'm being blessed and watched after. I love those moments. I love when I feel God's love for me. I feel like God is pointing me in the direction he wants me to go right now, and he is paving the pathway for it to all happen. I'm excited to see what's around the bend, but not naive enough to know that it will come with trials along with the excitement.
Moment 2: I wasn't supposed to be able to graduate until next spring, only due to one class that is not offered until next spring. With some guidance and some tender mercies and patience from God I was able to make it so I can be done with school Fall 2012!! My Professor is not making me take the studio class that is not offered until Spring, instead he hired me to be a producer on a film he will be making this year on Autism, this is how I will fulfill my credits. SO AWESOME! And I was able to get into ALL three classes I needed to, that normally I would have to be a senior before getting into, but by the Grace of God all the professors signed me in anyway, so I won't have to wait a year to graduate!!
Moment 3: My depression I have had for the past 2 months finally lifted! Things are looking up.
Moment 4: I go in for surgery on Monday to have a laproscopy. Not super fun, BUT 3 of my school classes for next week are cancelled, so I won't have to miss all my classes for the surgery. Good timing.
Moment 5: Sweet hugs and kisses from Aspen when I got home from School
Moment 6: Ashton cleaned up all the dog poop from the dogs pen before I got home. SOOO nice.
There are just moments when I just smile and feel like everything is right in the world and I'm being blessed and watched after. I love those moments. I love when I feel God's love for me. I feel like God is pointing me in the direction he wants me to go right now, and he is paving the pathway for it to all happen. I'm excited to see what's around the bend, but not naive enough to know that it will come with trials along with the excitement.
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